Posts Tagged Living Abroad

Misplaced Nostalgia

He was twenty-eight when he left India. Since he was a little kid, he always wanted to go abroad,  just like every other kid in his town.

The culture, the people, the society, and the way everybody was …… everything was different, very different. The life in California was not what he had imagined, but he adapted.

It was a big adjustment over the years, many compromises at every turn. In spite of all that, he did not complain much; after all this was his own decision – going abroad.

All those days, all those years  in America, he felt homesick; he missed the life he had left behind. The childhood memories, the old friends, the open fields – he often day-dreamed the life that used to be.  At times, he felt empty inside. He wished he could go back; go back to his real home, his real life.

The recession came; he lost his job – the high paying engineering job he had taken for granted. He looked for another job, half-heartedly; no luck. Perhaps he was secretly wishing not to work in US anymore.

“May be this is a sign from the God! My be I belongs back home – in India,” he thought, he rationalized. “My own people, my own culture, my own skin tone, my own mother tongue – that is my place; that is where I should be!” The recession made it easier for him to decide – it was time for him to go back. It was time to cure his nostalgia permanently. Read the rest of this entry »

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Just a job

He checked his Gmail account again. There were a few more responses to his online resume submissions, basically acknowledging the receipt of the job applications and a promise that ‘your resume is on file for future openings’. He has been getting these meaningless replies for the last one year, since he arrived in USA.

Back home in India, everyone had told him that it was very easy to get an engineering job in America. “You can make lots of money in a few years”, His future father-in-law told him at the time of his engagement 3 years ago. A year after that, he was married to Anu.

He had big dream; after all, nobody dreams small. Once in US, he was greeted by his wife and her family and they welcome him into their home. His old classmates, now living within driving distance, came to visit him.
He was treated like a guest for many months. However, he soon realized, you cannot be a guest for too long. He had to figure out the next step – the job. With all the expenses and cost of living, he needed a job soon. His parents and siblings back home were already calling to check on him; to see when he might send them some money like every other NRI does.

He was very optimistic about his career in USA, so was the rest of his American family – his in-laws. Just like any typical Indian family, everybody was full of advice:
“You can easily find an Engineering job in your field.. no problem for a smart guy like you…”
“There is no shortage of work for Indian Engineers…this is just the fact…”
“You will find something – something good, very soon….”

After a few months, the tone of the advice changed:
“You just need to try a bit harder, maybe try something in lower pay scale to gain some experience…”
“Find a way to get your foot in the door…”
“My cousin started as a technician; now he is the director of engineering…but they are not hiring…”
“You cannot give up…We never give up…”
“You will find something – may be not that good but something… something good….”

The time went by; ‘something good’ was still illusive after a full year of job hunt. Anu was very understanding all along. She had told him that it would not be easy, but he never thought it would be a slow torture like that.
Then the pessimism kicked in… the justification from every side, from everyone:
“Economy is bad…it is not your fault”
“There are no good jobs in this economy…”
“May be you can try something part time…”
“Have you thought about trying something different?…”
“You can work at McDonald’s for now….”
“just start with something, it is ‘just a job’ after all!….”
Yes, there was no shortage of advice and guidance……. Read the rest of this entry »

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INOC DC hosts Kapil Sibal

This post is a guest contribution by Lavika Bhagat

REPORT OF THE EVENT ORGANIZED BY INOC, DC CHAPTER

Indian National Overseas Congress (USA) Washington DC Chapter proudly hosted a reception in honor of Honorable Kapil Sibal ji, senior leader of the Indian National Congress Party, Minister for Human Resources and Development, Government of India on October 15, 2011 at The Mandarin Oriental Hotel, Washington DC.

Minister Sibal co-chaired the US-India Higher Education Summit with US Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton on Oct 13 and 14, 2011 at Washington DC. After this high-profile conference, Minister Sibal attended this personable breakfast gathering with a group of Indian American business and education leaders invited by Lavika Bhagat Singh, President of the Indian National Overseas Congress in Washington DC.

Attendees included representatives of the US Federal and State Government, prominent Indian Americans, IT industrialists, educationists, and Indian students studying in the Washington DC area. Among the many prominent Indian Americans were Dr. Natwar M. Gandhi, the Chief Financial Officer for Washington DC, Rajan Natarajan, Deputy Secretary of State of Maryland, Sanjay Rai, Provost and Dean, Montgomery College, State of Maryland, Raj Narsimhan who serves on Virginia Governor Bob McDonnell’s Commission on Higher Education Reform, Innovation and Investment. Read the rest of this entry »

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Yes, Life is different here!

Living Abroad – Different strokes for different folks!

Yes, life is different here, very different!!
People speak so many different languages here. Just walk down the street and you will get an earful of gibberish dialects for sure; many of those you have never heard of!

Here, people come from all over the places! They have different skin tones, different heights. They walk differently, they talk differently. Some have local accent; others are outsiders for sure. Some speak in a monotone while others are too dramatic in every expression. Some stand still and deliver their opinion in a quiet but firm voice, while others use their hands and gestures more than their tongue.

Some dress sparingly and reveal everything, very outdoorsy to say it modestly! Others are too covered, as if protecting themselves from a wintery chill, even in the summer months.

Yes, life is different here, very different!!
The food choices are quite interesting, or strange. Some like it plain and others, spicy. Some eat only vegetables while others hunt for meat. Some can afford it all, while others live from hand to mouth. Some like it exotic and show off their feasts while others struggle to feed even two times a day.

Some splurge in excess while others conserve all the time. Some fast, because they have over-indulged in food while others fail to understand the concept of diet control.

Yes, life is different here, very different!!
There are so many different religions; some are more popular than others. Not everybody believe in a God but they all have their opinions. Fighting over religion is very common. Everybody is so guarded against others’ religion. Read the rest of this entry »

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My new home…

Home is the earliest memory of my childhood;
Where I learned to walk and run.
Home is where I was taught everything;
To stand by myself, to stand for others.

Home is where I took shelter;
After picking up a fight with kids bigger than me.
Home is where I always ended up;
When I was tired, hungry or thirsty.

Home is where I learned the meaning of pride;
Home is where I understood humility.
Home is where I needed no welcome mat;
Home is where I took things for granted. Read the rest of this entry »

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Her Canada size compromises

She had big dreams, her ideology was based on truth, honesty and kindness. But that was a long time ago, that was when she was seventeen. She thought she was special; she was born to do great things; she was born to make a difference. But then again, that was was when she was in high school. She barely new the world out there. She never knew that the rules of kindness, love and truth apply differently beyond the walls of her house.

Somewhere along the way, somewhere in the process of growing up, she left her house to encounter the real world. She was no longer shielded by her family and her loved ones. It was part of her society, it was part of the traditions to move out. She got married; her family tied her knot to an educated man from Canada. Not because they knew him, or she loved him; they married her in the hope that life would be better in Canada. That is what everyone thought, and that is what they believed – she will be better off in Canada, far better off.

But then again, people are not what they appear to be. In the real world abroad, things are very different. The real world is far different than the one based on dreams; the real world where ideology is often talked but seldom practiced. Most of the people talk big but do little, she soon learned.

In no time, she was exposed to the double standards as she left her father’s house. She saw hypocrisy first hand – day in and day out. The lies, the deceptions, the compromises – everything was at play on the big stage of life. Read the rest of this entry »

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Plight of a woman in the NRI Marriages

For decades, this has been a common practice; it is a part of Indian thinking. Parents in India marry their beloved son or daughter to NRIs visiting from Western counties, with the hope and wish that he or she will settle abroad, and perhaps more importantly, help them migrate as well. While India is enjoying the financial boom, the common man still looks up to the other countries as the ultimate salvation for their offspring.

Yes, arranged marriage is still very common in India, and especially when it comes to marrying abroad. With very little knowledge about a ‘funny dressed’ visitor from the west, people are willing to bond their son or daughter overnight, before someone else steals their opportunity – the opportunity of a golden ticket to go abroad.

Marriage is supposed to be a sacred bond, based on mutual love and respect. However, NRI marriages are fundamentally based on greed. It is the greed that results into lifelong headaches for many couples, if not heartaches.

Everyone knows that the arranged marriage is no walk in the park, especially the arranged marriages where a couple knows very little about each-other. What follows in a typical NRI marriage is surprises, compromises and then more compromises. There are lucky couples who can adapt quicker and understand each other mush faster. And then again, there are probably more couples who find it hard to adjust, where ego comes into play more than love. What follows thereafter is a life-long misery, constant conflicts and endless arguments on daily basis.

Indian society, even modern Indian society, looks down on divorce. Many families don’t even consider the option of separation. And once you have kids in the mix, it is even more difficult to separate, both sides sacrificing for the sake of the kids.

The situation is especially difficult for the women who marry a man abroad. The women are more eager to adapt, more willing to sacrifice. Very often, the women go beyond the call of duty to satisfy their spouses in the new land. They often have very few relatives abroad to fall back on, they lack the family support, the support of their own blood. Women are less confrontational by nature to start with, and it works against them. Read the rest of this entry »

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The wandering thoughts

The wandering thoughts – the home abroad

It is human nature – we are always thinking, often wandering in our own thoughts. Thinking about past or future and imagining hypothetical scenarios is a part of our day-to-day life. We are never content with what we have, always thinking about ‘what could be’ or ‘what could have been’.

Millions of us leave our homes and our countries to go abroad, searching for a better future, looking for a better life. Some leave by choice – because we want to try new things and new places; others leave because of necessity, because they have to – for one reason or another. Regardless of where we are and what we have accomplished, we are never satisfied with what we got. Once we go abroad, once we establish ourselves in the the new place, our mind wanders and thinks about going back to the motherland – where we originally come from. It is not because we need to, it is not because we have to. It is because of our nature – we are never satisfied with what we have. The present is never enough!

Most of the immigrants, regardless how long they have been away from their own country or how good life they live in the new place, have nostalgic attachment to their homeland. It is nothing new, it is part of being human. We never let go of the past, especially if past involves sweet memories of childhood.

Many of us, those who are settled abroad, often think about going back, returning for good. Even after we have made new life in the new country, the thought of going back often creeps into our minds. It is a good nostalgic memory of past. Most of us think about it – going back permanently, but very few actually actually try it. And those who return to their motherland, the experience is often not what they expected or what we imagined.

The simple fact is that time changes everything. The home we left behind years or decades ago is not the same home anymore. Everything and everybody has moved on. The old friends, the old neighbors, the small shop at the corner, the big tree next to the pond – everything and everybody has moved on. The nostalgic memories from long time ago that we want to relive today are nonexistent in reality. The surroundings have evolved, the neighborhoods have changed and the even the culture and customs have changed over the years. Read the rest of this entry »

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Pardesi songs! Best Bollywood songs for the NRIs and Indians abroad!

The pardesi songs – Best Bollywood songs with NRIs and Indians abroad theme!

This article is dedicated to all the pardesi souls (foreigners) and NRIs around the world.

The ‘pardesi songs’ in this list focus on the situations and the emotions of Indians living abroad. Being away from motherland, being separated from the loved ones left behind, starting a new life in a new country and the distance itself….a mixture of emotions come into the picture. There are lots of patriotic songs and good ones too. However, the ones included here are more related to the unique situations of living overseas, rather than regular patriotic songs. Here are some of the best Bollywood songs that many NRIs and Indians living abroad can relate to:

1. Chithi Aayee hai (Movie: Naam): One of the best songs that directly connects to all the feelings of Indians who have migrated from India, but still miss their motherland. Beautiful lyrics tell a touching story of an average immigrant.
Tune paisa bahut kamaya
Es paise ne des chhudaya….

Pankaj Udhas’s melodious voice adds to the appeal of this evergreen and super-hit song.

2. Bharat ka rehne walaa hoon (Movie: Purab Aur Pachhim): ‘Hai Preet Jahan Ki Reet Sada / Jab Zero Diya Mere Bharat Ne’ is one of the most memorable song that highlights the virtues of India and the Indian culture, especially for those who live overseas. This number has ideal settings – featured in England with crowd including Indians, hippies and English audience. Mahendra Kapoor’s voice and Manoj Kumar’ acting is a winning combination.

3. Ye dooriyan (Movie: Love Aaj Kal) : The song filmed on Deepika Dadukone and Saif Ali Khan is all about the ‘distance’ from loved ones. Anyone living abroad can relate to this song, a number with great composition and brilliant lyrics.
Aa raha paas, ya door mein ja raha
Janu na mein hoon kahan pe…

It has a natural flow, and is a hybrid of modern folk and classical gazal – a lovely song by any standard.

4. Yeh Jo des hai tera (Movie: Swades): This is one of the most melodious songs from A. R. Rahman. The lyrics and the scenes bring out the emotions of being Indian and being away from home. With SRK in the lead and beautiful filming, the song highlights all the nostalgic feelings often experienced by Indian diaspora.

5. No life without wife (Movie: Bride & Prejudice): Yes, this is not one of those emotional or sad songs, for a change. However, this cleverly performed dance number sums up the feelings and the irony of the situation that NRIs and their spouses go through. The refreshing song has the ever-pretty Aishwarya Rai in the lead. It is a befitting satire on the NRI marriages.
Lonely Mr Kholi from Los Angeles
Came to Punjab on one bent knee
He had a Green Card, new house, big cash
Still made a wish with every fallen lash
…….
Poor Mr Kholi
He has no life without wife…
Read the rest of this entry »

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Self-help tips on minimizing Hinglish usage abroad

10 easy Tips on how to minimize the usage of Hinglish (Indian English) overseas

Many of us, especially those who grew up in India, speak ‘Indian English’. This version of desi English – the Hinglishis, is heavily influenced by Hindi, other languages from India and desi terms. It is a common habit; and like many other habits, some times we don’t even realize that our English speech is often affected by our mother tongue.

Just like any other habit, the use of Hinglish is not so easy to get rid of. Habits die hard. In many cases, it may take a lot longer to get used to avoiding Hinglish completely. A conscious effort is always required to navigate away from any set routines, especially the ones related to our communication or speaking habits.

While living overseas and away from India, we may not realize this but we are always adapting to the local ways of life. This process continues even when we are not trying. This is a human nature; we are always adapting to our surroundings. Our language, our communication style and even our thinking – every aspect of our day-to-day life is slowly but surely impacted by the local culture and the society we live in. However, this adaptation and change is often very slow. The same applies to our habit of speaking Hinglish, the change is very slow unless we try consciously.

Listed below are some of the most effective tips on how to minimize the use of Hinglish while living in an overseas society. There are many simple things that we can do to speed up this adaptation to local English slang and language instead of continued habit of speaking Hinglish.

1. Be aware of your Hinglish usage: The first step always is to accept and acknowledge the habit. The second generation of Indians who grew up abroad (among English speaking culture) generally don’t have this habit – the habit of mixing Indian idioms and grammar with English usage. If you were born and raised in India, chances are your speech is influenced by your mother tongue.

2. Think of a few fun things to reduce Hinglish usage: Now that you admit to the Hinglish usage :) , next step is working on how to minimize this habit. The tips below are quite effective, but you can always come up with your own plan. For example, you can ask your American/English friends to assist and coach you in this arena. You know yourself better than anybody else on this planet, so think of your own ideas and fun things that would work best for you.

3. Immerse yourself in the local language overseas: Expose yourself to the local way of speech while living abroad. Make a conscious effort to speak local English by surrounding yourself with those who use local English style and slang, not Hinglish. Read the rest of this entry »

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Have a scary and spooky Halloween!

Happy Halloween!

Have a spooky Halloween!

Here we go again – another summer gone, another winter knocking on the door. The end of October is here; the kids are shopping for the costumes; the candy aisles in every store are stocked to the limit.

Yes, that Halloween is here.

The wizards, the warlocks, the witches, the vampires, the princesses.….you name it… kids all over America and many other countries have been busy for weeks, planning for this big day. Everyone has figured out what they want to be for the Halloween night, the finishing touches are in the final stages….

And, the grown-ups are not far behind. The households are decorated in the orange hue. The pumpkins and a variety of odd spooky objects occupy the front yards everywhere, creating a haunting scene in every neighborhood. There is no limit, nothing is considered extreme – the skeletons, the fake graveyards, the glowing spider webs, the ghostly creatures…..everything is a fair game. Read the rest of this entry »

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Moving Overseas! Is Your Family Ready?

The world has become a very mobile place now-a-days. Nobody spends the whole life at one place, or even in one country. Traveling has become a necessary part of everyday living. Going abroad, trying new places, visiting new countries, exploring new cultures….all this has become a common undertaking.

When you move to a new country for a long studies or for a job, you have to leave behind so much. The family, the friends, the home, your own country…this all becomes a part of the endless memories of living in India. Those childhood days, college fun, home food, Indian culture and tradition …. all this can never be replaced or forgotten.

Moving overseas brings its own excitement. You are eager to see new places, make new friends and explore your things. However, it is a fact that you cannot ignore your loved ones far-away who are going to miss you and feel your absence day and night. Just like you, your family and friend are left behind with your memories alone to remember you by.

Every family is different and so are the reactions to the departure of a family member. Nobody is ever ready to separate from the loved ones. However, there are a few simple things that you can do to help your family accept the fact that your overseas move is not so bad after all. These commonsense and easy-to-follow tips can make this separation more tolerable, for your family as well as for you:

1. Discuss you decision to go abroad: Once you have decided to move abroad, share the news with your family well in advance, and then with the rest of the world. Some family members and relatives might discourage you from leaving the country. Especially in the beginning, they may be against your idea of going away. It takes time to accept such a big news. It may also help if you have a calm and collected approach to the whole thing. Explain to them your reasoning or purpose for doing so; share the positive factors behind your decision to go abroad.

2. Family Time: The days and months before you leave are always very hectic. You are bound to get occupied in your packing, passport/visa formalities, shopping, insurance, health checkup, etc. You may not realize how the time could fly by. Spend some quality time with your loved ones; set aside some family time before you head overseas. This will surely result in some good memories for rest of your life. Read the rest of this entry »

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Citizenship and Immigration Canada – CIC Website

CIC – Canadian Government Source of Citizenship and Immigration

Have a question about immigration to Canada? Interested in Canadian Citizenship? Any question on migrating to Canada? Almost all the time, you can get your answer from the official website of Citizenship and Immigration Canada. Commonly know as CIC, the site is maintained by the department of Canadian Government that deals with Immigration and Citizenship. It also links immigration services with citizenship registration.

The site is the true Bible for any information on Canadian Citizenship as well as immigration to Canada.  It offers a variety of resources on the related topics including general information, commonsense tips, guidance for potential immigrants, latest news on the subject, the new laws affecting the immigrants and so on. There are different sections addressing different aspects of immigration and citizenship.

Getting to know Canada: For an outsider, this section offers lots of general information about the country. All kinds of basic topics are covered:

  • The weather
  • The Land and geography
  • The People
  • Education system
  • Medical system….etc.

Prepare to Move to Canada:
Once you know about the country, and may want to immigrate there, the next logical step would be the preparation to migrate. The information in this section pertains to the planning for the move:

  • The cost of living
  • Where to live in Canada
  • Learning the language
  • What documents you need for immigration
  • What you can bring with you…etc.
  • Read the rest of this entry »

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U SPECIAL – Your FREE ticket to travel abroad

Not too long ago, good grades and a decent scholarship used to be all you needed to go abroad for higher education. Now-a-days, with cost of studies sky-rocketing, the students are looking for every penny they can get to meet their dire financial needs. Here is one of the opportunities for those who want to venture overseas.

Thomas Cook (India) Ltd. [TCIL], India’s leading integrated travel and travel related financial services company recently announced the ‘Thomas Cook Wings Scholarship’. This is a unique offer for students traveling abroad for further studies.

TCIL is currently introducing various programs under the brand name ‘U SPECIAL.’ One of the main programs – the Thomas Cook Wings Scholarship is a great opportunity for students heading overseas. The students can potentially win an education scholarship worth an air ticket to go abroad. 10 shortlisted students can receive a scholarship up to Rs. 35,000/- each.

So how do you participate in this competition to win the air ticket? The main requirements are quite simple: submit a 2 page University statement of purpose (SOP) and email to uspecial@in.thomascook.in. You can also submit the SOP at any Thomas Cook branch in your city. The 10 best SOP’s will be short-listed based on the following criteria:
a) Correct usage of English
b) Clarity of thought
c) Overall flow.
Read the rest of this entry »

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India through the eyes of my American Classmates

“So how do you like it here, in US?” This is a common icebreaker they use with new classmates from other countries.
“I love it; it’s fun!” is my general response. After all, I don’t need to complain about my homesickness to everybody.
“I would love to go to India, but am little bit worried about the safety and stuff over there; ….”  Some hesitation about a new country is far away is quite normal among Americans.
“Stuff like what?” I like to explore what they think about India.
“Well, it is a new place; plus I don’t speak Indian.” Some say this as a joke, while other are clueless to the Indian languages.
And sometimes, the things get slippery after such small talk! And sometimes, that’s where the snakes, the elephants and other wild animals jump into the picture. Some questions, asked even with the utmost seriousness, beg for a chuckle, if not a full blown laugh! :)

I like my American classmates and friends just as much as my desi colleagues, well almost. At least, that’s what I would like to believe and that’s what I try anyways. Many of these firangs are my close friends. We eat together, we study together and we goof-off together. It’s a fun bunch of people I am surrounded by.

I am one of the three Indians in our class. There are students from everywhere – Canada, European countries, Australia, Kenya, Mexico and Korea…to name a few. They all come from a very diverse background, not to forget in all colors – white, brown, black, yellow, pink, dark pink…well, sometimes it is hard to tell the real color with all the makeup on. :) Read the rest of this entry »

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