Category Archives: Communication Skills

Indian values or right values?

Learning the mother tongue…
The Sunday classes in the temple or Gurudwara…
Attending religious recitals even if you don’t understand what the priest is saying….

Growing up abroad is a challenge in itself, not that we realize it when we are kids. You not only have to worry about the the bigots and the racist idiots on the street, but your parents and elders are paranoid to the point of obsession; the obsession with raising the kids with ‘Indian values’.

Growing up in India – you are amongst your own kind; you are emerged in your own culture. As a a child in India, the social values are spoon-fed over the years; you are surrounded by your own skin color; you are the majority. No confusion, no duplicity.

Living abroad however, our culture at home is often different than the culture on the street. We are dealing with a multicultural society. Our social settings totally different and multidimensional. As a kid growing up, we adapt to the surroundings, to the society we grow up in.

Growing up in American or any other Western society, the Indian American families tend to hold on to the inherited culture and Indian social values much more closely. The parents cling to the carried-over traditions from India, holding on to the Indian roots very dearly. The Indian families make a VERY conscious effort to instill the Indian values into their kids. Continue reading

Accent improvement for Indian speakers – the ‘V ’ vs. ‘W’ sound

English Pronunciation for Indian and South-Asian Speakers: ‘v’ vs. ‘w’

Listen carefully to Americans/British speakers when they say words with the letter ‘V’  and ‘W’. Notice how the ‘V’ sounds very different from the ‘W’; there is a clear difference between ‘w’ and ‘v’ sounds. Even though most of Indians understand the difference, the distinction is often not carried out in spoken English.

In Hindi, Punjabi and many other native languages from India, we do use ‘V’ sound. The absence of ‘W’ sound in our mother-tongue may be the reason that we often confuse/mix-up the two sounds in English language.

The ‘V’ sound:  To pronounce the ‘V’ sound correctly, place lower lip gently against the upper front teeth and make the sound. Don’t press it hard, you should be able to exhale through, while making the sound. You will need lots of practice if you are not used to it.
Remember, ‘V’ is a “hard” sound; make a tone, don’t just breathe out. Just breathing out makes the ‘F’ sound. Continue reading

Accent improvement for Indian speakers – the rolling ‘R’

Accent and pronunciation improvement for Indian speakers – the case of rolling ‘R’
When it comes to English language, especially for a novice speaker from India continent, many sounds and pronunciations need extra attention. The ‘r’ sound is one such challenge for many Indians treading the English speaking universe.
The American/English ‘r’ sound is very different from the way many Indians pronounce it. Without realizing, some of us put extra stress on ‘r’; this extra stress/pronunciation may sound similar to ‘rolling r’. Continue reading

How to improve your body language

Ten tip on how to improve your body language

The body language plays a key role in day-to-day communication. Body language includes non-verbal communication such as body posture, gestures, facial expressions and eye movements.

Depending on the circumstances and who you talk to, the body language will differ. However, here are some important tips on how to improve your body language for effective communication:

1. Make eye contact, but don’t stare: Make eye contact while speaking or listening but not too much. Too much eye contact may look like staring and may distract the other person. You can find a happy medium with practice.

2. Relax your body, don’t fidget: Relax, don’t be nervous. Maintain a relaxed pose instead of all stiffened up. Avoid or minimize fidgety movement and nervous ticks. Do not shake your leg or tap your fingers against some surface.

3. Maintain some distance: In many cultures, people get too close or even all touchy feely. If other person starts to step back, you will know that you are invading his/her space. You can lean forward to make a point or listen, but don’t be in other person’s face.

4. Smile: Smile when you meet someone or when you start a new conversation. Don’t be overly serious all the time. Smile frequently to show a likable attitude. However, don’t maintain a constant smile on your face, it may look fake. You can laugh if it makes sense but too much laughing may look odd.

5. Hand gesture: Use your hand gestures to stress your points or opinion but don’t overdo it to the point that your gestures become distraction.

6. Don’t cross your arms or legs: Crossing your arms all the time makes you look too defensive. This is habit in some cultures and you can improve upon it by practicing.

7. Mirror: If you mirror other person’s body language during a conversation subconsciously, it means that you are connecting. You can use reverse thinking and consciously try to mirror the other person to show that you are connecting. You have to be sincere, however; otherwise it will look fake and odd. Continue reading

The art of elocution

Elocution – The secret of effective speaking

In movie The King’s Speech (2010), while watching a clip of Hitler speaking in German language:
Lilibet: What’s he saying?
King George VI: I don’t know but… he seems to be saying it rather well….

And, you ofter hear people saying:
“Choose your words carefully; you may have to eat them!”….

“Be careful what you say; it may come back to bite you!”….

Yes, it is important what you say. But equally important, perhaps more important is how you say it. After all, it is not what comes out of your mouth, but how you deliver it. Your style, your tone, your body language….; all that adds up to the actual message.

Elocution is the basis of effective communication skills. Elocution is the art of clear and concise manner of speaking, with clarity of meaning and thought. Elocution originates from the word ‘eloquence’ – fluent, elegant or persuasive speaking. It is the knowledge of expressing strong emotions in striking and appropriate language and with the power of persuasion.

Effective speech has deep roots in elocution – the pronunciation, the accent, the grammar, the tone and the gestures play a key role in forming a meaningful and desired message. Elocution is been considered a key aspect of learning the art of communications. The art of elocution has been dissected, studied and taught in the schools for a long time. According to McGuffey’s New Sixth Eclectic Reader of 1857, the key principles of elocution are:
I. Articulation
II. Inflections
III. Accent and Emphasis
IV. The Voice
V. Gesture
VI. Instructions for Reading Verse

I. Articulation: How you phrase your message and enunciate it, how you put your thoughts into proper words is the most important aspect of effective speech.
By definition, articulation is the act of vocal expression and enunciation; it is the act or manner of producing a speech sound.

II. Inflections: Inflection is bending or sliding your voice either upward or downward. This is where you need to know your grammar. Inflection is the modification of a word to express different grammatical categories such as tense, grammatical mood and grammatical voice. Proper inflection is very useful to express mood, contrast, irony and sarcasm etc.

III. Accent and Emphasis: How you pronounce, formulate and stress different part of your speech make a big difference. By nature and by habit, our accent and the way we speak are always affected by our social surroundings. It is important to understand the right accent and how to use it for a proper emphasis on the right syllables. Your accent is a large part of your expressions and how the listeners perceive you, as a result. Continue reading

Hinglish – Indian English idioms and phrases – II

As mentioned in many previous posts, spoken English in India is very different as compared to the same language overseas. Our Indian languages have significant impact on English we speak back home. The Indian English – combined with heavy influence of Hindi and other local languages – is also called Hinglish. There are many related posts on this web-site on Hinglish usage and Hinglish words, and here is another one.

Quite a few commonly used Hinglish words and phrases are listed in the article:Hinglish of India – Indian idioms and phrases. This is the follow-up, part II.

Adding to the previous list, here are some commonly used Hinglish words and phrases:

Equation has changed :- Relationship has changed, e.g. “My equation with my brother has changed.”
Road-side Romeo – refer to a boys/man waiting near the street entrances to colleges and universities, or to those cruising the city streets in search of women to impress
Rubber :- Pencil eraser
cent per cent :- 100 per cent
Where do you put up? :- Where are you currently staying?.
Wheatish (complexion) :- light, creamy brown, or having a light brown complexion.
Flat :- Apartment
shirt-pant or pant-shirt :- Shirt and Trousers
tight slap :- hard slap
Out of station :- out of town.
Acting pricey:- playing “hard to get”, being snobbish. Continue reading

From desi Hinglish to fluent English

Those of us raised in India speak a very different English than the one spoken in Europe or North America or Australia. And it is natural, we are creations of our surroundings, we are always influenced by our mother tongue. As a result, the influence of Hindi language is naturally present in our English speech, hence the term Hinglish.

On this site – The Indians Abroad, there are quite a few articles that address the usage of Hinglish and how to minimize it. Speaking Hinglish is not a mistake or something to be overly concerned about, it is just a habit – the way we speak in our own neighborhood. Think about it, even Australian spoken English is far different than the American English. The local factors and the local slang are bound to influence the way we speak.

Hinglish usage is quite common in India, it is natural. No one cares, and no one should, as long as two parties can understand each-other. However, when we speak the same Hinglish abroad, not everybody is able to understand or comprehend the complete meaning, especially for those who are not familiar with desi terms and desi idioms.

This article is a compilation of previously written articles on topics related to language barriers abroad and the Hinglish usage. Rather than re-writing the whole summary, following links are a good start on how to minimize the use of Hinglish and what are the best approaches to adapt to the local speech while living abroad.

  • Crossing the Language Barrie abroad: ‘Language barrier’ refers to the difficulties people face if they don’t speak the same language, or with very different accent or style….the spoken English in America or other Western countries is not the same as in India, for example. The key issues surrounding the language barrier and the best ways to approach or alleviate them are highlighter in this article.
  • Self-help tips on minimizing Hinglish usage abroad: There are many simple things that we can do to speed up this adaptation to local English slang and language instead of Hinglish from India. This article lists some of the most effective tips.
  • 12 Self-help tips on improving desi English language: These are some of the commonsense tips on how to improve your English while living abroad. Try them, some of them you may already be exposed to.
  • 10 Tips on English pronunciation and accent improvement!: Accent plays a big role in our speech pattern and how we come across to the listeners. Adapting to the local accent is the first step towards improving your language skills.
  • ’30 tips on the art of small talk’: Small talk or any chit-chat helps you practice your speech and conversation skills. As a result, you end up improving your spoken language.
  • Continue reading

    Self-help tips on minimizing Hinglish usage abroad

    10 easy Tips on how to minimize the usage of Hinglish (Indian English) overseas

    Many of us, especially those who grew up in India, speak ‘Indian English’. This version of desi English – the Hinglishis, is heavily influenced by Hindi, other languages from India and desi terms. It is a common habit; and like many other habits, some times we don’t even realize that our English speech is often affected by our mother tongue.

    Just like any other habit, the use of Hinglish is not so easy to get rid of. Habits die hard. In many cases, it may take a lot longer to get used to avoiding Hinglish completely. A conscious effort is always required to navigate away from any set routines, especially the ones related to our communication or speaking habits.

    While living overseas and away from India, we may not realize this but we are always adapting to the local ways of life. This process continues even when we are not trying. This is a human nature; we are always adapting to our surroundings. Our language, our communication style and even our thinking – every aspect of our day-to-day life is slowly but surely impacted by the local culture and the society we live in. However, this adaptation and change is often very slow. The same applies to our habit of speaking Hinglish, the change is very slow unless we try consciously.

    Listed below are some of the most effective tips on how to minimize the use of Hinglish while living in an overseas society. There are many simple things that we can do to speed up this adaptation to local English slang and language instead of continued habit of speaking Hinglish.

    1. Be aware of your Hinglish usage: The first step always is to accept and acknowledge the habit. The second generation of Indians who grew up abroad (among English speaking culture) generally don’t have this habit – the habit of mixing Indian idioms and grammar with English usage. If you were born and raised in India, chances are your speech is influenced by your mother tongue.

    2. Think of a few fun things to reduce Hinglish usage: Now that you admit to the Hinglish usage :) , next step is working on how to minimize this habit. The tips below are quite effective, but you can always come up with your own plan. For example, you can ask your American/English friends to assist and coach you in this arena. You know yourself better than anybody else on this planet, so think of your own ideas and fun things that would work best for you.

    3. Immerse yourself in the local language overseas: Expose yourself to the local way of speech while living abroad. Make a conscious effort to speak local English by surrounding yourself with those who use local English style and slang, not Hinglish. Continue reading

    U SPECIAL – Your FREE ticket to travel abroad

    Not too long ago, good grades and a decent scholarship used to be all you needed to go abroad for higher education. Now-a-days, with cost of studies sky-rocketing, the students are looking for every penny they can get to meet their dire financial needs. Here is one of the opportunities for those who want to venture overseas.

    Thomas Cook (India) Ltd. [TCIL], India’s leading integrated travel and travel related financial services company recently announced the ‘Thomas Cook Wings Scholarship’. This is a unique offer for students traveling abroad for further studies.

    TCIL is currently introducing various programs under the brand name ‘U SPECIAL.’ One of the main programs – the Thomas Cook Wings Scholarship is a great opportunity for students heading overseas. The students can potentially win an education scholarship worth an air ticket to go abroad. 10 shortlisted students can receive a scholarship up to Rs. 35,000/- each.

    So how do you participate in this competition to win the air ticket? The main requirements are quite simple: submit a 2 page University statement of purpose (SOP) and email to uspecial@in.thomascook.in. You can also submit the SOP at any Thomas Cook branch in your city. The 10 best SOP’s will be short-listed based on the following criteria:
    a) Correct usage of English
    b) Clarity of thought
    c) Overall flow.
    Continue reading

    21 Topics for Small Talk Conversation for all occasions

    Small talk – a conversation or chit chat without any specific topic – is a necessity in any social or professional environment. In fact, making small talk is the lesser of an evil when you compare it to an awkward and drawn out silence. But, what would you talk about – during small talk.

    Here are some of the most common topics to start a conversation, or keep it going:

    1. Hello/Hi: A simple hello is good way to start any small talk.

    2. Introduction: If meeting for the first time, make sure to introduce yourself. It shows your interest in the meeting, and puts a name to the face.

    3. Situation and surroundings: Talk about the surroundings or the venue: ‘Nice place, huh!’ or ‘I like this cafe!’

    4. Weather talk: This is all time classic, may be a bit too much used. However, a talk about weather always gets the conversation going.

    5. How was your day? : If the meeting is in the late day or in the evening, talk about how your day was, there is always something to share: ‘how is your day going so far?’

    6. So what are you up to today/tonight? : Ask about short term plans for the day, or the night or the next day. This is always good way to keep the discussion going. Continue reading

    Hinglish of India – Indian idioms and phrases

    Hinglish: Indian English lost-in-translation abroad – Idioms and phrases from India

    “What is your good name, sir?”
    “Steve”
    “It is nice knowing you, Steve Ji!”
    …..
    “Hey Boss, are you enjoying the fair?”
    “Simply! Enjoying to the maximum!”
    ….
    “How was the movie?”
    “First-class!”

    “I will give you a ring over the week-end.”
    “OK boss”

    As mentioned in many previous posts on this site under ‘Communications’ category, English in India is spoken very differently as compared to the same language overseas. Our Indian mother-language and the grammar has significant impact on English – taught as a second or third language throughout the country. Sometime, the Indian English – due to the influence of Hindi and other local languages – is also called Hinglish.

    Just a small clarification on the scope of this article. Of course, there is a mush more involved ‘Hinglish’ spoken within Indian communities, ( “Tired, kya?” = “Are you tired?”). As long as both sides understand, there is no harm, no foul. However, we tend to include some ‘Hinglish’ even when talking to American or English audience abroad. That is where we run into some miscommunication. This post will focus only on this flavor of subtle Hinglish. The hard-core Hinglish, may be some other time.

    Many English words, Idioms and Phrases have different meaning in India or are used only in India. When used abroad, they don’t feel right or mean something different.

    Here are some of the common idioms and phrases, and their closest (or alternatives) usage in proper English when outside India:

    What is your good name?: A polite way of asking someone’s name; it comes from translation of Hindi phrase – Shubh naam (good name). ‘May I know your name’ or ‘You name please?’ is more appropriate in non-Indian settings.

    Eve teasing: It refer to sexual harassment of females, or taunting them – as in schools or colleges or in bazaars etc.

    Poor Joke (pj): ‘Poor joke’ is not a commonly used phrase, a more common way of saying the same thing is ‘bad joke’!

    Time-pass: Relates to doing something trivial or of little importance, that does not matter. ‘Nothing imprortant’ is one of the many alternative way of responding, instead of ‘time-pass’.

    Time-waste: This is worse than ‘time-pass’, doing something you don’t even enjoy. ‘It is a waste of time’ is a similar expression often used in Western countries.

    Himalayan blunder:Very big mistake, a mistake of the size of Himalaya mountain. Blunder generally means ‘big’ mistake..may not need too many adjectives that are not commonly used overseas. :) Continue reading

    How to improve your communication skills

    The previous post titled ‘What you say? – Importance of Communication skills’ (linked below at the end of this article) covers in detail the basics of different types of communications and their overall importance.

    Now, communications – the ability to share and exchange ideas and thoughts – consist of a wide range of skills. For example, you cannot be a good communicator just by being a better speaker, or just by being a good listener.

    And, if the exchange is not in your mother tongue (the first language) – such as some one from India in USA – it takes some extra efforts to be good at this. Here are some of the main areas to consider for improving your communications skills:

    Know what you are talking about: A communications or an exchange of ideas or the conversation is hollow and empty if it has no substance. Knowledge of the topic of discussion helps with a meaningful discourse. And, if it is just a friendly ‘chat about nothing’ – the small talk – that can also be improved, just read on! :)

    Be a good listener: Listening is the first and foremost part of the communication. It helps with understanding the topic of discussion (‘Know what you are talking about’ step above). A good listener also earns the respect or the speakers and is always in-tune with the discussion. For details on improving this skill, refer to the article titled ‘how to improve the listening skills.’ The importance of listening is highlighted in a separate article linked here.

    Improve verbal communications: Along with listening skills, equally important is the ability to deliver the message – the talking part. A good command of the language, a good vocabulary and ability to effectively speak are the desired attributes for being good at verbal communication. Those with mother-tongue (the first language) is different than the communication language often struggle in this sector. If English is your second language, or if you need to improve your accent in the new language, make sure to consider the tips and suggestion in the article titled, ‘A self-help guide to lose your accent.

    Make a small talk: Small talk matters. Small talk is the art of chitchat – talking about ‘nothing’. The small talk warms up the conversation; it can set up the mood of the discussion. The article ‘30 tips on the art of small talk’ has lots of good information on how to improve your small talk skills. Continue reading

    Whatcha say? – Importance of Communication skills

    At home or overseas – Importance of communication skills

    “You can have brilliant ideas, but if you can’t get them across, your ideas won’t get you anywhere.”~ Lee Iacocca

    “They don’t seem to fully understand me”
    “Am I speaking a foreign language or something?”
    “How come no body is listening to me?”
    “Is it my accent that is limiting my range of communication?”

    Your ability to communicate defines you as a person. You can be the most knowledgeable person around, but if you cannot share your ideas – if you cannot communicate – your knowledge may not mean much.

    One of the main hurdles in adapting to a new place or becoming a part of the new culture is the difficulty of integrating into the new society. Our ability to effectively communicate with other is very important in adjusting to a new place, or a new culture. In fact, our success or failure in any walk of life often depends on how well we communicate with others. Any business, any workplace, any relation, any family, any society…..is built around communication.

    In the basic sense, a communication takes place when two or more people share or exchange information, ideas, gossips, knowledge etc. The main ways of communications include:
    Verbal or oral communications: This is where we talk and listen. The ideas are exchanged, the rumors are discussed, a mother sings a lullaby to the little one, a leader delivers her vision to the followers…..Most of our daily communications are oral, unless you are a writer hiding in the basement – writing away your ideas or fantasies, waiting to be discovered. The oral communication almost always involves personal contact with the audience, with some exceptions such as talking on the phone.
    This is the area – the verbal exchange – where most of us struggle in a new place or in a new culture. The verbal communications are often different place-to-place, even if the same language is spoken. Every place has its own ways of communicating:

    • local slang
    • local style
    • local dialect
    • use of local terms that an outsider may not understand

    Continue reading

    12 Self-help tips for Indians to improve English language command

    Self help suggestions and tips on improving Indian-English or Desi-English language abroad

    “Are you enjoying the movie?”
    “Simply”
    Translated literally from Tamil, simply means absolutely.

    There is nothing wrong with the above conversation if both sides know the intended meaning. Now, move that conversation to somewhere in USA or Canada or England, with someone who does not know the ‘Tamil-English’, the actual meaning is lost in the translations. :)

    English language and English grammar is a bit tricky for those who are not used to it, for those with English as a second language. The basic mistakes we make are when we ‘think’ in our mother-tongue, and then translate in our head (Many of us say ‘translate in my mind :) ), and then speak in ‘translated’ English. Here are some self-help tips on improving desi English overseas:

    1. Knowing and Having – the problem of the progressive tense: many Indians often translate and speak with excessive and often inappropriate use of progressive verb form.

    For example, consider this:
    “I am having a fever.”
    “I am having a small family”
    “I am knowing that you are having a party without sending me invitation.”

    Of course, the correct way of saying is:
    “I have a fever”
    “I have a small family”
    “I know you are having a party without inviting me.”

    2. Isn’t it – The tag question: We tend to use ‘isn’t it’ without any discrimination. :) . It is a habit, but not a good one – everything is not it.

    For example:
    “Those are lovely flowers, isn’t it?”
    “She is so pretty, isn’t it?”

    The correct version, of course, is:
    “Those are lovely flowers, aren’t they?” Make sure to refer to plural ‘flowers’ as ‘are’ not ‘is’.
    “She is so pretty, isn’t she?” Make sure to refer to her as ‘she’ not ‘it’

    3.The Royal treatment – the big word syndrome:
    The Indian English dialects have originally evolved during and after the colonial rule of Britain in India. We tend to use the royal and big word in day to day speech; such usage is not common in western day-to-day English, especially in the spoken English.

    For example:
    That is a magnificent idea!
    That is a splendid look!

    It is not wrong, but more suitable conversation may be:
    That is a great idea!
    That is beautiful!

    4. ‘But’ or ‘only’ to stress a point: That is another thing. We use ‘but’ and ‘only’ to stress. Consider this Indian way of saying, not correct grammatically:

    It was he only who broke the glass.
    She was just joking but.
    She did not go only.

    You could say it better such as:
    He broke the glass. Or, It was he who broke the glass. ( the stress is on ‘He’)
    She was only joking.
    In the end, she did not go.

    5. Mr. Smith and Mrs. Johnson – Showing respect by using last name: In India, it is cultural thing that we shy away from using first name for our elders, or our superiors at work. However, Western culture is much more informal when it comes to addressing each-other. So it is okay to call your boss by his/her first name, it is okay to call someone much older than you by first name.
    If your Boss is John Davis, it is okay to call him John, instead of Mr. Davis.

    6. Uncle and Auntie for friends’ parents – NOT: Continue reading

    How to overcome the Culture Shock abroad

    10 tips on how to overcome the overseas culture shock

    The overseas culture shock is common for anyone traveling or migrating abroad. Some of us are quick to adapt, willing to accept the change. Others hate it and don’t like customs or traditions of living a life different that what we are used to growing up.
    The fact is that it is not a matter of one or two days; if you plan to live abroad, you should be willing to adapt to what comes with it – the new culture, a different society and an entirely different everyday life.

    Adaption is not a quick or overnight thing; getting used to the new place can take a long time. However, here are 10 tips on how to overcome or minimize the culture shock abroad:

    1. Accept the change: Change is part of life; it is a part of the journey. Don’t resist something just because it is different. Give it a try. Millions and millions before you have gone through the same experience abroad. You may actually like the ‘new you’ if you try.

    2.Learn the local language: This step is very important, actually the most important. If you really want to adapt to the new place, learn the local language, the local way of communicating. This includes getting used to the new accent and losing the old accent; the local way of pronunciation and the local slang – the whole nine yards. And, don’t forget to learn the art of small talk in a new society.

    3. Venture out and try first hand: Don’t isolate yourself from the local culture. Expose yourself to the local common places where social life breathes. The shopping mall, the hair salon, the barber shop, the community center, the local parks….. – go be a part of the day-to-day outdoor life. The best way to adapt is by trying it firsthand. Continue reading