Theory of ‘Positive Thinking’ is fundamentally flawed!

Everybody is preaching ‘Positive Thinking’ these days. You probably receive these fancy quotes and messages in your email. Positive thinking is a fashion now.

Imagine that you are very sick and every part of your body hurts; you are in constant pain, and have no energy to even move. However, a medicine-man tells you to keep smiling and stay positive….
A single mother loses her job, her only means of income for her family. A motivational speaker tells her not to worry, not to be depressed; …. Everything will be okay…..
You are falling off a cliff. Well, don’t worry about your skull about to be crushed. Think positive!!….

Are you kidding me?
Stay positive and be optimistic all the time? Keep smiling even when I know that things are bad, and about to get worse?…

It seems like we are trying to find every excuse in the book to avoid the reality. Instead of facing the true situation, the advice is to ignore it –‘look at the beautiful sun-rise, isn’t it beautiful? Don’t worry even if you are not doing well! Just admire the nature- the moon, the stars, the rainbow…!!’
How could you think about the sun-rise if your own world is tumbling down?

The sad truth is that the reality of our mortal existence does not guarantee a rosy season all the time. Along with the sunny days, we are bound to encounter some storms, may be many more storms and cloudy days. That is how it is; just look around yourself, you can find many examples in your everyday life.

The fact is, you cannot stay positive all the time. You and I – all of us- are bound to go through highs and lows of life. So is the nature of the world; so is the life.

We – all of us – always have something to worry about. Even the kings worry constantly. Bigger thrones have bigger problems – more worries. That is how the world works. You cannot be happy ALL the time. If you are happy all the time, underline this – there is something wrong with your head.

The internet is full of websites after websites on how to be happy. Positive thinking is preached everywhere – in seminars, at your work place…. It is a business, and obviously a good one too; people are paying big bucks to stay positive and think positive. Motivational speakers who preach positive thinking are in big demand.

Don’t listen to any of the; in fact you should never listen to these motivational preachers when in comes to positive thinking or staying positive all the time. Believe me, there is no one out there who can preach you for a few hours, or a few days, to give you a recipe of happiness.

Should you be positive and happy all the time? Should you imagine this world to be a rainbow on which you could dance all the way – one side to another? No, you should not.

Instead of worrying – oops..I forgot, if ‘worrying’ is not supposed to be in your dictionary. :)
Let me rephrase this: instead of ‘trying’ to stay positive ALL the time; try dealing with the underlying problem or the issue; I am sure you have something to worry about, try fixing it. And, after it is fixed, you will have something else to worry about. Welcome to the real world…the world you already knew!

Dare I say, it is okay to be negative every now and then. It is okay to lose hope once in a while. It is okay to feel sad. It is okay to fall down sometimes, or even frequently. It is okay to worry. You are not alone, we all do. We all fall down, and then get up – sometimes by ourselves, sometimes with the help from friends and family. It is not important to stay positive, getting back up after a fall is more important.

Having a positive attitude and sunny outlook is good; it is good for your overall state of mind. However, unless you have found a way to control your thoughts and state of mind, the real world experiences do take us through times and scenarios where sunny outlook is hard to maintain, where positive outlook is lost. Some of us lose the positive outlook sooner than others, it is just a matter of threshold.
It is okay to lose the positive outlook every now and then. It is not uncommon; it is very common.

Be realistic. Be realistic about what you get from your own brain – from your own thinking; it will give you highs and lows. You cannot change the way you think overnight – by attending a seminar. The way you think is a part of you – it is part of how you grew up; it is a part of your surroundings.

Along the real-life journey, if you are unhappy, unsatisfied or not feeling positive all the time, that’s okay. It is not an end of the world. We are supposed to feel it all– good or bad; happy or sad; positive or negative…..
You are a human being, not a superman or superwoman!


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