Archive for September, 2009
In search of…’Khao, Pio, aish karo!’…abroad!
Let us eat and drink: for tomorrow we diet. ~Wendy Morgan
We all know the basic Indian Mantra of daily life- ‘Khao, pio, aish karo!’ : Eat, drink, enjoy life!
Many of us live by this simple but profound philosophy. Growing up, whenever in doubt, we have often taken shelter under the wide umbrella of this slogan! 
Since landing in America years ago, I always wanted to find out if this desi mantra ‘Khao, pio, aish karo!’- ‘Eat, drink, enjoy life’, applies overseas as well. To verify my curiosity, I needed to find a swamy or a guru, who knows it ALL; someone with ultimate knowledge of life and its principles. That is how I stared my personal journey to look for a divine saint full of wisdom to answer this basic question.
I always thought that such a deep and thoughtful slogan has to be backed by some Indian religion. I was almost certain that it was from some ancient guide; may be a part of Lord Krishna’s preaching to Arjuna during the great battle of Kurukshetra….
So I went to see a pundit at the local Hindu temple. I was not surprised to see him sitting on a small dais with a laptop next to him. After the simple greeting and some chit-chat about Google versus Bing, I popped the question:
“Khao, pio, aish karo! – is the slogan from the Hindu religion?”
He laughed at first. After realizing that I was serious, he started to search something online. I could not wait to be enlightened, but I did not want to interrupt him and his thoughts…
Finally he spoke, “Nope”
“Are you sure?” I did not believe my ears.
“I swear by the holy book Gita, your so called mantra is not in there”, he sounded serious.
“It has to be in there!” I insisted as the priest shook his head again.
“No, it is not” He repeated.
“So, what should I do?” I was losing my faith.
The priest got closer to me and whispered, with a smile, “Khao, pio, aish karo!”
Bewildered, I walked away. Read the rest of this entry »
All time greats of Hollywood
When it comes to hollywood, there is no shortage of movies with great drama, action, romance or imagination. Many of you may disagree with the list of all time favorites, as everyone has different tastes and different likings. Picking just 25 out of thousands of good movies has its own flaws.
However, these movies, not in any particular order, are some of the best of the bests:
1. Godfather
2. Godfather II
3. Gandhi
4. Goodfellas
5. The Lord of the Rings series
6. Harry Potter series
7. Pup Fiction
8. Schindler’s List
9. Gone with the Wind
10. E.T. – The Extra Terrestrial
11. The Wizard of Oz Read the rest of this entry »
Active Listening: How to become a better listener
Listening skills are very critical for meaningful and fruitful communications. But it is easier said than done !
“Are you listening?”
We have heard this so many times growing up, many times form our teachers, more time from our parents and siblings. It sounds simple, but listening is not an easy skill to master. It takes patience to listen; it takes practice to be a good listener. It is human nature, we love talking more than listening.
Of course, this article is about active listening; not about random hearing, or casual listening- such as listening to our favorite music etc.
“Did you hear something?”
“Yes”
“What was it?”
“Somebody talking at the door”
“About what?”
“Don’t know”
“What you mean?”
“Oh, I didn’t pay attention; I wasn’t listening!”…
It takes conscious effort to be a good listener. It is commonly said that we become better listener with age. Now, lets us not wait on grey hair and beyond !
There are a few key things that we can proactively do to be better at listening:
Pay attention: Well, no surprises here. Paying attention to the speaker is first and foremost requirement. Lack of attention span is one of the biggest problems with poor listening. If we don’t make an effort, it is very common to drift into our own world, especially if the ‘talk’ or the topic is not of our interest.
Eye contact: The eye-contact helps with connecting to the person speaking. It helps understand where the speaker is coming from. The eye-contact also helps with improvement to attention span, and ’staying’ with the speaker.
Avoid distractions: Avoid any kinds of distractions. Loud noise in the back-ground, cell-phone ringing or someone else talking at the same time can easily affect the ability to listen to the intended conversation. Read the rest of this entry »
In many countries including USA, the new season of autumn, (or the ‘fall’) begins today – September 22!
“Autumn is a second spring where every leaf is a flower” ~ Albert Camus
It was summer yesterday; today’s morning begins the season of autumn. A reminder that the long sunny days are almost history now, the winter chill is waiting around the corner.
Yes, the autumn is here, the season of melancholy. Many consider this to be the time of solitude, other call it a perfect calm, to get in touch with spirituality.
The colorful leaves are ready to fall. In the beauty of colors lie the reality that gold never stays….
It is time to take out the blankets, get the quilts ready for winter to soon follow…..
The seasonal birds are ready to fly south….
Sounds pretty gloomy, right? May be not; you be the judge:
Just look around. Step outside and look at the Mother Nature. Everything is so colorful. The green leaves are slowly turning – to yellow, to gold, to crimson red!…. The canvas of mixed colors stand on every river bank, on every pond, along every street…. A magical view; just like any modern art – so random, yet so scenic. An illusion of paradise, some might say.
Everything around us is a reminder of transition. The fall is a taking over where the summer left. The life goes on; nothing wrong with it.
The farmers welcome the fall season with new hopes. The pumpkins are turning gold; the corn-ears are changing color. The long summer toils in the farms are finally ready to pay off; the crops are ripe for the harvest season. As they say, if you do not sow in the spring you will not reap in the autumn. …but only if you didn’t sow, I am sure you did… !
And, when it comes to the kids, there is no time for solitude or melancholy. The summer break is over; the schools are back in session. With new friends from the new classes, the new adventures have already begun. The Halloween season is around the corner, it is time to decide on the costumes for trick-or-treats. It is time to get the bags ready as the loads of candies and sweets wait to be consumed!
The stores and markets are getting ready for the new shopping seasons. The Thanksgivings holidays will soon jump-start the Christmas sales everywhere. It is time to replenish the supplies and stock up the inventories with new fashions and new trends. For young and old alike, there is something to look forward to – the new toys, the new stuff, and the new excuses to shop!
In India and for Indians all round the world, the autumn is a special time of the year. It is time to get ready for festivals. Read the rest of this entry »
Pay attention, and listen up!
“Most of the successful people I’ve known are the ones who do more listening than talking.” ~ Bernard M. Baruch
“Did you hear what I say?”
“Yeah”
“What did I say?”
“Can your say it again…I wasn’t listening..”
“Now, listen up and pay attention!”….
Ask any parent or school teacher, it takes lots of effort to get your point across, or get some-one’s undivided attention. The fact is, listening skill is not that simple, or natural. Our mind always tends to wander off. It takes a conscious effort to be a good listener.
Now, we all know some good talkers in our families and friends who always have something to say. However, good talkers are not always good communicators. In fact, listening is equally, if not more, important for effective communications.
The listening skills are very important for anyone who is serious about personal development and improving the communications skills. Listening is even more important if English (or the language of conversation) is not your mother tongue.
Here are some of the key benefits of being a good listener:
1. Key to communication: Listening is important part of any conversation. It helps to better understand the view point of the other party or the speaker. More than half of the conversation or communication is paying attention to and understanding the other side.
2. Shows maturity and respect: It shows maturity and respect to the speaker or the other parties involved in the conversation. Constantly interrupting without listening never leads to a meaningful and enlightening conversation.
3. The healing power: Most of us generally have a friend or family member that we can call whenever we need to vent or express any frustration. It is generally someone who is willing to ‘listen’ to us and put-up with our emotional out-pour or complaining even if he or she has nothing to do with the situation. It is not that we desperately need advice; sometimes, we just need someone who can listen to us. A good listener can always provide emotional support and has a healing power; it is a god sent gift to be a good listener. The gift of listening certainly deserves more credit than it receives in our daily lives. Read the rest of this entry »
Bollywood Movies- The best of best!
The opinions vary, the tastes differ. When it comes to the best of Bollywood movies, it depends; It depends on who you ask and in what mood they are in. There are way too many VERY good movies out there. Here are some of the best ones:
Sholay: Needs no explanation. The dialogue, the story, the cast, the acting…everything is so refreshing. The story moves at its own natural pace. It has everything you would expect in a drama movie or an action film or a romance flick.
Pakeezah: Beautifully directed, this movie is a combination of good artistic tastes, a great storyline, excellent settings and a brilliant music.
Mother India:The first Indian movie to be nominated for Oscar, this is one of the highest ranked movies in the international film festivals, and for a reason. The cast of Nargis, Sunil Dutt, Rajendra Kumar and Raj Kumar is lead by a brilliant acting and timeless direction all around.
Mera Naam Joker:Raj Kapoor spent every penny he had on this movie, and it flopped during the first release – it was just too long with run time over 5 hours. The second release, the re-edited and compressed version, ended up as one of the most successful film of all times. It has something for audiences of all ages.
Mughal-e-Azam :This is one of the most expensive movies ever made of its times. It took more than 9 years to finish this beautifully filmed feature. The star cast is ultimate; the dance sets are unparalleled for its time. Some of the famous dance sequences of Madhubala are filmed in the Shish Mahal -The Palace of Mirrors- in Lahore Shahi Qila. Read the rest of this entry »
The Summer Memories!
Sep 16
One more Summer gone by, where are your memories?
The kids are going back to school; the days are shrinking again, the nights getting longer. The sunny days of summer are ready to say goodbyes. There is a chill in the morning air…
The days go by, the time keep ticking; the meaning of life is lost somewhere in between…
It was only yesterday that we were kids; we used to look forward to the summer breaks. With the hot sun scorching all day, we never cared or complained about the summer heat of India. The air conditioners were rare. To save electric-power, there were electric shut-downs everyday for hours, but that did not bother us much. There were very few things to worry about.
Every summer, there used to be something going on. The life was simple but rewarding. Every day eventful. Even the trivial stuff mattered. Roaming aimlessly with a group of friends had a purpose. The lasting monsoon rains and lightening storms never stopped any of us from venturing out. Stopping was not in our plan towards meaningless destinations… or wandering thoughts….
I remember one summer a friend of mine was infatuated with this girl. She was visiting her aunt, a few houses down the street from his house. She was in town for the summer break.
Every evening on a set time, she used to come out on the roof-top balcony. He would wait for hours- even though he knew she would not come out until her aunt is busy in the kitchen. On the far side of the street, he would stand there waiting…
Eventually she used to come out and he would stand their with a smile; they would exchange the ‘hellos’ by waiving, the controlled little waive without letting anybody else see the gestures. This was their daily ritual that would last from a few minutes to half an hour depending on the surroundings or nosy neighbors. One day, on his asking, I watched them from behind his door. I was his witness, so he could brag to all our friends about this ‘achievement’ of his…. Read the rest of this entry »
“The language barrier is probably the most difficult and takes the longest to overcome.” ~ Stephen Lee
Most of the times, the phrase ‘Language barrier’ refers to the difficulties people face during communicating if they don’t speak the same language; or if the speech or accent is too different to communicate effectively.
Almost everyone who ventures out to the worlds far-far away, the language barrier is one of the many hurdles encountered in the new land. For people migrating from India, even though they speak and understand English in most of the cases, the communication problems still exist. The fact is that spoken English in America or other Western countries is not the same as in India. The style, the slang, the acceptable norms….everything is different. One is bound to feel out of place in the beginning of this overseas journey.
The key issues surrounding the language barrier and the best ways to approach or alleviate them are:
The language knowledge: Knowledge of the English language is the most important step toward adjusting and adapting to the English speaking culture and society. The understanding of grammar and sound knowledge of vocabulary are necessary to build a reliable foundation for any language. For people from India, this is not a major issue because most of us learn English in school and have a good command of the language itself.
The ‘thick’ accent: The accent is natural; this is how we talk and speak in our native country growing up. The Indian accent of English –commonly called ‘thick’ accent- is very different from the way they speak English overseas. While there are ways to soften the accent or dramatically reduce it by practice and with conscious effort, it takes time to lose the accent. For details on this topic, refer to the previous post titled ‘A self-help guide to lose your accent!’. Read the rest of this entry »
Aishwarya Rai and Abhishek Bachchan to appear on Oprah Show!
Aishwairya Rai in 'Devdas'
The most influential woman in the world, Oprah Winfrey, is back with 2009 season of her world famous and the highest rated talk show. The downtown Chicago area – the Magnificent Mile- was closed to traffic last week as she kicked off the 24th season of Oprah Winfrey Show.
When it comes to the influence of this billionaire, Oprah is a force beyond comprehension. She has single-handedly popularized and revolutionized the tabloid talk show genre. Oprah has a very loyal world wide fan base, especially among women. A book lands on the ‘best seller list’ just by her mentioning of it on the show; the cattle ranchers in Texas get nervous if she promotes vegetarian food or says something against beef…..When Oprah talks, people listen!
And look, who is coming back to the Oprah show again- Aishwarya Rai! The popular Indian actress and former Miss World is no stranger to the show; and this time she brings her husband, Abhishek Bachchan, with her.
Aishwarya Rai is supposedly in Chicago with her beau preparing and shooting for the show. It is ‘rumored’ that the couple has been in USA for more than a week. Obviously, they did not get stopped by the immigration, otherwise we would have heard of it. Read the rest of this entry »
Business is a combination of war and sport. ~Andre Maurois
A large number of businesses fail soon after the start. Many of us don’t know what we are getting into; or the market conditions are very different than what we imagined. A sound business case involves thorough planning, in-depth understanding and good knowledge of market conditions for the related products or services. Anyone can open a business anywhere. People start it from their kitchen-tables or garages. A simplest business is the kids’ lemonade stand on the street corner. Staring a business is easy, sustaining a profitable operation is a different story.
Here are some of the key factors to consider for a successful business start-up:
Know what you are doing: A good business case requires understand of your niche, services or product. With today’s competitive world, one needs specific expertise, knowledge and ability to provide a seamless and reliable product or service.
Business Plan: Planning is the most important aspect of a new start-up. A thorough and robust business plan includes the overall business strategy, market analysis, financial aspects, risk analysis etc. If you have a good business plan, most of the following elements in this article could be part of it. A business plan could be dynamic and flexible that could evolve and change based on changing business needs or market conditions.
Find a Niche: Finding a niche with unique and focused appeal is very important. If possible, find something -product or service- that specializes in a key area to attract certain clients, and with very little existing competition. Look for a way to set yourself apart from others by focusing on specific customer needs and interests.
Location, location, location: Every street vendor in New York City knows the importance of prime location. For a brick and mortar business, the location is everything. The location alone can make or break a business. The business site should be easy to access, in a good neighborhood, and should make a good first impression on customers and walk-ins alike. Read the rest of this entry »
Tips on house hunting abroad – in USA or Canada!
Have money? Like shopping?…
When it comes to housing today, it is a ‘buyer’s market’. ‘House for sale’ signs are multiplying in every neighborhood; with lots of sellers eager to sell. It is a good opportunity for those who are looking for house.
The process of finding and purchasing a house can be fun or a headache, depending on the circumstances or how you approach it. In most of the cases, the main reason for a house purchase is:
- upgrading to a house from an apartment,
- moving into a new area due to job or business or family reasons,
- buying a house for renting out, or as an investment.
Regardless the reason, the house buying process is quite similar in all such cases in USA and Canada. Many of these steps or commonsense rules also apply for rest of the world as well.
Here are the key factors and main steps to consider before and during the house purchasing process:
Selecting the real estate Agent: The house hunting in itself is an adventure. Some people try it by themselves, while others hire a real-estate agent – the realtor. A good real-estate agent is instrumental to finding the right house and closing the deal smoothly and efficiently. A real-estate agent can simplify the whole process to an art. So, it is very important to hire a good and reliable realtor. Make sure to interview -yes, interview- multiple agents and ask all the appropriate questions including:
- their qualifications, experience and background,
- do they work alone or in a team?
- their track records or success rate,
- knowledge of the area,
- overall chemistry or easy to work with,
- Any other factors that are important to you: For example, possible issues of the language barrier etc.
Many Indians hire a realtor from their own community while others prefer a professional strictly based on the qualifications.
Know your budget:How much are you willing to spend, or how much can you afford, is always a good question to ask. There are many online tools that can help with calculating the monthly mortgage amount, and other expenses related to house buying and maintenance.
Mortgage pre-qualification: It is important to make sure that you are able to secure the financing for the house. Talk to your bank or a mortgage expert/broker, and find out how much mortgage you can get. Make sure that you feel comfortable with the loan amount, and the resulting monthly payment. Read the rest of this entry »
California satae legislature passes the ‘Kirpan bill’ to support Sikhs dress code
Most of us -from India or those of Indian origin- need no introduction to ‘kirpan’. It is a small blade that resembles a sword in shape, and is carried in a shoulder strap. It is one of the Sikh articles of faith, or a religious symbol that Sikhs wear after baptism. Over the years, many Sikhs have been questioned and arrested overseas for carrying a kirpan. The police, for example in USA, can compare the kirpan to carrying a concealed weapon if they don’t know the Sikh tradition.
In an effort to recognize the Sikh dress-code, the Californian state legislature unanimously passed a bill to train law enforcement personnel about Sikhs and the religious significance of ‘kirpans’.
Summary and the excerpts from the bill:
“SUMMARY:Requires the Commission on Peace Office Standards and Training (CPOST) to create and make available to all law enforcement agencies a training component on how to recognize and interact with a person carrying a “kirpan”.
Excerpts from the Bill:
“Sikh Americans form a vibrant, peaceful, and law-abiding part of the United States community. California was one of the first places that Sikhs settled in this country over 100 years ago. Today, California is home to a large number of the Nation’s 500,000 Sikhs….” Read the rest of this entry »
Someone has to say it!
Sep 4
Find the ‘helping’ voice within, that often goes unheard
“There is no witness so terrible, no accuser so powerful as conscience which dwells within us.” ~ Sophocles
Remember a time when someone needed help and you passed by?
Recall an incident where something felt wrong and thought you should do something and yet, you could not find the courage?
Or, may be it was none of your business, but did you feel bad or guilty walking away?…
In our daily lives, what do we do when we find something wrong, when someone is acting against what we believe is right or moral or ethical?
More often, the answer is ‘nothing’.
We let so many things slide by, it is amazing!
We are often telling our family and friends as to what we believe in, we have our opinions and we are not shy about voicing them. However, the same voice is lost somewhere when we step out of our social or family circle. The opinions get suppressed when we are out of our comfort zone. Read the rest of this entry »
“Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week.” ~Spanish Proverb
Today is the day to stop and fight procrastination
Okay, today I cannot procrastinate. There is no way, not today!
Every First Wednesday of September is ‘celebrated’ as Fight Procrastination Day. Today is the best day to get my acts together and start working on the projects or things I have been postponing for ever, today is the day to find ways to stop procrastination. I am already feeling good about myself….
There are many things I have been lazy about. I guess the best approach would be to make a list of all those tasks and attack them one by one without any further excuses.
First of all, cannot they come up with a smaller word? It takes for ever to type it…no wonder I am lazy about…you know this long word.
Anyways, without further delay, let me put together a list of things-to-do that have been sitting on the side for too long:
Exercise: I am always lazy about going to gym. I need to find a way to break this bad habit. But, I have been under the weather a little since yesterday. It is probably a better idea not to stress my body any more, and rest and relax. I will resume it as soon as I feel up to it, I promise, most likely by the week-end.
Organize the office: The things are all over the place in my office. The books, different gadgets, half full boxes of all kinds of stuff that I never emptied…. The drawers need organizing; there are cables all over. I need to get this going. Let us slate it for the week-end, because this could take some time.
Clean the garage: I cannot dare to start this one right now. I am not sure how long it will take, or what else I am going to stumble into in there. This is not one project, but many projects hidden under the mess. Need almost half day. So, may be this week-end. Yes, this week-end, for sure.
The garden fix-up:Need to trim the plants in the backyard; many areas need mulch and more weed control. I will certainly work on it once the weather gets better. It was so hot until last week, and now it is chilly all of a sudden. The week-end is supposed to be nice and sunny, so I can plan for then.
Organize the bills and papers: The mail and papers are every where – the kitchen table, living room, office and some even in the bedroom. This could get very time consuming, will do it first thing on the week-end.
Visit India: I have been delaying this for a while. This is the year, well may be around Christmas, if I get long enough break. Or next year for sure.
Okay, these are the main things. I have my list to fight procrastination:
Things to do List:
Exercise: Start this week-end
Organize the office: This week-end
Clean the garage: This week-end
The garden fix-up: This week-end
Organize the bills and papers: This week-end
Visit India: This week-end..NO,this won’t work, later on.. Read the rest of this entry »
The US Customs and Immigration affects Bollywood travels to US
Shahrukh Khan
SRK stopped by US Immigration office for additional questioning; he blame US immigration for profiling based on Muslim name!….. – 8/11/09
Salman Khan is concerned about the US Immigration office; cancels his US trip!…- 8/28/09
Salman Khan has cancelled his upcoming trip to New York. The bollywood star was planning to visit USA to promote his upcoming movie ‘Wanted’. One of the main causes for this cancellation is quoted to be the recent incident where US immigration stopped Shahrukh Khan for additional questioning at Newark airport.
There has been much reported on this SRK immigration incident. The whole thing is blown way out of proportion by the media with so many twists and turns. Many are of the opinion that the agenda was to promote ‘My name is Khan’, his upcoming movie about experiences of a Muslim in USA in post-9/11 era.
The US Customs and Immigration denies any profiling and called it a routine stop, mainly because his baggage was delayed. You decide- who is right and who is wrong.
Salman Khan
As a part of security measure of modern days, every country including USA is being extra careful as to who crosses their borders.We all know, the US Immigration and Customs check-point is last place to find friendly faces. The custom officers’ job is to probe everyone who enters the country and try to separate the good guys from bad ones. They frequently stop all kind of travelers –white, black or brown- for additional questioing and screening. The officers do tend to be a bit authoritative, and many may consider them ‘rude’; but that is the nature of their job.
So there you have it! Two Khan’s-the Bollywood mega stars vs. the US Customs and Immigration…. It is hard to fathom that Bollywood is so much worried about ‘not-so-friendly’ US Immigration officers. These Bollywood heroes, whose daily job description is to overcome the hurdles and fight big bad bullies in the movies, seem to shy away when it comes to passing through US Immigration and Customs. Is it that the real life drama is more intimidating than a Bollywood script with a pre-planned favorable outcome?
Come on our Bollywood heroes, you can do better than that! We are so used to your bigger-than-life persona, your bare-hand fights against evils of all sizes! You can single-handedly kill an army of villains in those movies; demolish anything that crosses your path, or that of your love-interest! You can jump out of high rise buildings, dash out of flying planes and come out winners without a scratch on your body. And yet, you are scared of an immigration officer at a US check-point? Where is all that bravery that we are so accustomed to witness on the big screens? We all thought that you are tough enough to put up with some questions from a non-smiling customs officer in real life! Read the rest of this entry »
